Navigating Change
Where to find calm and confidence during big life transitions
Welcome to a new week!
Thanks for being here to celebrate another week and to bring more intention and focus into the week ahead of us.
Right now, I’m sitting amid a lot of changes in my life. Some planned. Some unplanned. Some expected, but still surprising. That’s kind of how life goes, right?
Maybe you are in the same boat? Or you’re thinking about stirring up some change somewhere in your life. If so, you’ll enjoy this issue of The LIFT.
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PLANNED CHANGE
My husband and I have been laying the foundation for some big changes in our lives this past year or so. A new business. A move. All big stuff. And, it’s all lining up nicely for later this summer. It’s been fun planning and watching all of the pieces come together one by one.
Of course, there have been moments of angst and debate along the way, but it’s all part of figuring out the course and the pathway from one spot to the next. We’ve done a great job working through those conversations and painting a clear vision we are both excited about. We also laid out a realistic timeline and game plan so we could enjoy the process with minimal stress.
It’s a luxury when you have the opportunity to truly plan and orchestrate life changes.
One thing I have noticed throughout the process is this feeling of calm and confidence. Rather than feeling ‘worried’ along the way about whether things would play out as planned, I’ve had a feeling of ‘curiosity’ to see how it all turns out.
We were so clear on our outcome and what we wanted that we knew it would play out exactly as it was meant to be. And, it has.
Some changes are like that. Or, they can be. If we give them the time and resources they require.
UNPLANNED CHANGE
One thing we did not plan for was that the company I have been working with for the last nine years would close its doors.
Not all changes are planned.
Even so, you can be somewhat prepared for the unplanned.
In this case, as surprised as I was, I’d been sensing it for a long time.
We often know change is coming, but we act like it’s not. As if, ignoring it will somehow make it not happen. When instead, we should listen to that soft voice that is nudging us in other directions or toward new opportunities.
A lot of unplanned changes have clues and signs along the way that we can use to prepare ourselves so we don’t have to experience the stress of sudden change. Of course, we tend to take things for granted and then miss those signs.
It’s interesting to watch how people react to unplanned changes. The panic. The scrambling. The emotions. I’ve watched a lot of that over the last few weeks among my colleagues. But somehow through this transition, I have felt a strong sense of calm and confidence. It just felt clear that this was part of the next chapter - one that was already unfolding.
Of course, some changes are more sudden and life-altering. An illness. A death. A natural disaster. These are things we can all expect to experience at some point if we live long enough.
In some ways, we can’t possibly prepare ourselves for these. But, at the same time, there are things we CAN do if we choose to do the hard work of facing their potential in advance.
There is a lot more calm and confidence to be found in accepting the potential of something rather than pretending it doesn’t exist.
How many times do we ignore the opportunity to prepare ourselves for the unplanned?
EXPECTED CHANGE
Then there are changes you expect and try to plan for, but they still surprise you. That’s how menopause has been for me.
I came into this stage of life with a lot more education and knowledge than most women in my generation. What to expect. How to prepare. And, even so, it’s been a surprise in so many ways.
I expected it was more than what I had been led to believe and certainly it has been.
Menopause changes you at much deeper levels than we acknowledge or realize. It’s not just how we look and how we feel - which are expected and yet still surprising. It also impacts how we think. How we operate. What we value. Who we are. What we want. What we don’t want.
As women, we learn how to navigate the changes of puberty and motherhood. But, no one prepares us for the changes that come from this stage - a stage when we give birth to ourselves.
It’s hard to find calm and confidence in that sort of surrender. But, what I’m learning is that surrender is exactly where that confidence and calm lie.
Calm and confidence ultimately come from authenticity. Being your full self.
So much of our energy in life goes into ‘trying to be’ something rather than just being who we are. No wonder we get ourselves worried and confused. It takes a lot of energy to not be yourself or to try to keep things a certain way when change comes.
Maybe change is exactly where the confidence and calm you’re looking for are waiting for you?
WELCOMING CHANGE
There is an amazing energy that comes from letting go of expectations and letting change in. Allowing change to live in our bodies and our hearts. Maybe that is because we are not stagnant beings. We are forever evolving. So, it’s not possible to be your full authentic self without letting change in - the planned, the unplanned, the expected and the unexpected.
The more we allow ourselves to be the authentic, evolving being that we are - the more we can enjoy the wild ride of life with a sense of confidence and calm that comes from letting go and leaning in.
YOUR MISSION:
This week, I challenge you to welcome change in some way, shape or form. Notice it in your life, in your body, in your heart - and let it deliver the gift it has for you.
RESOURCES:
LISTEN: On the Verge of Big Changes You May Question Everything | Matt Gottesman
LISTEN: How to Build Real Confidence: 7 Truths to Unlock Your Authentic Self | Mel Robbins Podcast
IN SUMMARY:
If you’re in the midst of change, I hope you will take some time to listen to the two podcasts I shared in the resources section above. Lots of great insights worth pondering.
Meanwhile, thanks for being here and know that I am cheering you on through the changes you’re facing. It’s all part of the story that makes life so rich and uniquely ours.
See you next week?
Thanks. Even the planned changes can be surprising as you say
❤️👏🏻another well-written article. Good luck on your move. 😊