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A FINE LINE
It’s a very fine line between pushing ourselves + forcing ourselves.
How can you tell the difference between when you are challenging yourself to grow + when you are forcing yourself into something that just isn’t you?
We are told we can do anything we put our minds to. We can suffer through anything to reach that finish line. The goal. The prize. But CAN we? SHOULD we?
STAY IN YOUR LANE
Last weekend, I ran the Carlsbad Half Marathon. There are so many life lessons to learn from endurance events.
In fact, I truly think this lesson might be the biggest challenge of our lives.
I have been training so much this past year that I know my body very well. I know a ‘good day’ versus a ‘bad day’. I know how various paces feel in my body. I know when I can go faster + when it’s better to slow down.
A funny thing happens on race day.
Most people take off too fast. You get caught up in the energy of those around you. And pretty soon, you realize you are going faster than you trained for - which you can get away with for a while, but it ALWAYS catches up with you toward the end when you find yourself completely drained or in pain. And, then it’s too late + you just have to suffer thru or quit.
It happens.
The key to avoid suffering + ensure you finish strong is to hold back just a bit. Start a little slower. Listen to your body + find the pace you know you can maintain. Stick with your training + the goal you prepared yourself for. Don’t get caught up in running someone else’s race.
When the starting gun went off, I was right next to a designated pacer (this is someone who acts like a pace car for the runners) that was running at what I knew was a comfortable pace for me for this distance.
For the first mile or so, I jogged along at that pace while I checked in with my body.
As I warmed up, I knew my body was feeling good. I knew I could go faster + I picked up the pace a bit separating myself from the pacer.
Once I found my sweet spot, I held steady + from there, I managed to hold that pace the entire distance. It felt amazing! I was able to enjoy the view, take in the full experience + feel good the entire time.
I was ‘pushing’ myself to run 13.1 miles, but I wasn’t ‘forcing’ myself. There’s SUCH a big difference.
And just like that, I finished the event feeling good + I hit a personal record on my finish time. To top it off, I had energy all day. No soreness. And, I enjoyed the view along the way. It was actually quite fun!
Meanwhile, I can assure you, not everyone had the same experience. I passed plenty of people who were clearly forcing themselves to finish. You could see their pain + misery as they cracked the whip on themselves. They were NOT having fun.
RUN YOUR RACE
The way I ran this particular event is the way I want to live my life. I want to run MY race. At my pace, not someone else’s. I want to perform my personal best without injury. And, I want to enjoy the ride. To be present. To take in my surroundings. To notice the lessons + the miracles along the path.
I don’t want to suffer through, beat up on myself, get caught up in the energy of those around me, drain myself + find myself at the end injured or completely drained having run someone else’s race - rather than my own.
We live in a day + time where comparison is chronic. It’s SO hard to avoid. I’m sure every generation has had its challenges. “Keeping up with the Jones” has been a norm for decades, but right now? With social media added to the equation, we don’t even realize how deep our tendency to compare runs.
You’d think we would ‘grow up’ + get beyond the whole comparison game at this stage of life. Instead, it can easily get worse. It’s SO easy to get caught up in comparing yourself to where you think you should be. Your career. Your retirement. Your cash flow. Your relationships. Your purpose.
You can feel like you’re falling behind some arbitrary goal that you never set to begin with. Someone else’s race.
YOU DO YOU
If you’re reading this right now, chances are you are living in one of the most wealthy countries in the world. You have technology that will allow you to share ALL of who you are + to amplify your unique gifts. You have limitless choices about what you can do with your life.
And, we live in a world where you are actually encouraged to ‘be yourself’. That wasn’t always the case. In the industrial age, we were trained to be cogs in a wheel. To put in the time. To do as we were told. Life was more of an assembly line.
Today - those who are expressing their unique talents + gifts are the ones who are being rewarded. And, no life path can really be duplicated. Each is unique.
So, rather than comparing ourselves to others, maybe it’s time to invest that time + energy into finding ourselves.
At this point in the year, most people have already given up on the goals they set at the start. They came out of the gates hot. They didn’t pace themselves or train. They burned out before they even got started. They were running someone else’s race.
So, consider this a reminder.
This is YOUR race. You get to find your pace. You get to choose how you feel along the path. And, when you find yourself caught up in a pace or on a path that isn’t yours, you get to pause + get back on your own track.
There’s a reason you were born to live out your life at this specific time - a time where you are rewarded for being yourself…not for copying others.
Maybe it’s time to let that sink in.
This is the biggest challenge of our lifetime - to find a lane we love, a pace we can sustain + the gifts that are uniquely ours to share along the path.
YOUR MISSION:
This week, I challenge you to notice when you are in your lane + when you are caught up in the energy around you. Can you feel the difference? Do you know what triggers you to get off course?
RESOURCES:
READ: The Importance of Staying in Your Own Lane and Not Comparing Yourself to Others | Medium
READ: 13 Things to Do Instead of Comparing Yourself to Others | Tiny Buddha
READ: The Mental Health Benefits of Staying your Your Lane | Therapy for Black Girls
READ: 4 Ways to Stay in your Own Lane | Medium
READ: Tunnel Vision - How to Stay in your Lane | The Silver Linings Group
READ: 40+ Quotes Stay in your Lane Quotes to Keep you Focused on Yourself | Kidadl
IN SUMMARY:
Speaking of lanes, I just remembered a time in high school when I went bowling with my best friend. She was not the most coordinated or athletic person. In fact, quite the opposite. That day, she walked up to roll her ball down the alley + it actually rolled over into the next lane + knocked a few of those pins over. Talk about not knowing how to stay in your own lane! LOL. Let’s try not to be THAT person!
See you next week?
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In the meantime, tell your friends!
This is so true & it is a constant challenge, like you said, especially with social media, to stay in your own lane and not compare yourself to others. I struggle with this a lot, but continue to try to fight that tendency & let myself be comfortable with staying in Kelly’s lane. ♥️
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