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BEHIND THE SCENES
I had the opportunity to hear Brendon Burchard speak last week at a leadership conference in Austin, Texas. If you don’t know him, Brendon is a New York Times best-selling author + high performance coach.
I read several of his books + followed him for many years. Somewhere along the way, he dropped off of my radar. So, it was really fun to see him up close + personal at this conference.
Brendon is actually really incredible at what he does. I was impressed with what he provided our team + you will definitely hear me reference key takeaways from him in future issues of The LIFT, but today, I want to share a couple of thoughts that stuck with me that were a very small part of what he talked about.
A few days prior, I had listened to Max Fisher on the Rich Roll Podcast. Max is a New York Times investigative reporter, Pulitzer Prize finalist, and author of a new book called The Chaos Machine: The Inside Story of How Social Media Rewired Our Minds and Our World.
I haven’t read the book yet, but it’s on my list now. It was a super interesting conversation about how social media acts as a drug. I highly recommend listening to the podcast, reading his book + exposing yourself to this information. I included links in the resources section below.
My post this week is really just a weird overlap of ideas that came from hearing these two guys speak.
THE OBVIOUS
I don’t think it’s any secret how much social media has affected our lives.
Good ways. Bad ways. Unknown ways.
It’s the thing we all love to hate. We want to throw it out the window + hug it all at the same time.
It’s one of those tools that could be (and sometimes is) amazing for us as humans. At the same time, its addictive nature has us confused about whether we control it or it controls us.
SIDE NOTE: What’s really mind-boggling is how much of our time it consumes. Those little hits of dopamine throughout the day add up when you string them together.
Did you know that the average person now spends 2 hours + 27 minutes on social media every day?!
The average person also watches 3 hours of TV daily! So, when you put it all together, that’s a LOT of hours! It’s nearly a full-time job. No wonder we have ‘no time’ … to workout or cook or meditate or get organized or … fill-in-the-blank.
Whether you believe your social media use to be below or above average, the time suck is definitely something to be aware of. If you’re trying to better yourself in some way + can’t find time to make it happen, your screen time might be a good place to look. You might be surprised how many minutes you are losing throughout the day to distractions that really don’t have value.
But I digress.
Okay, we all know that social media sucks up time. We’ve all had those times when we’ve gotten sucked in + lost track of time scrolling.
We also know too well how social media seems to bring out the worst in humans. We talk to each other online in ways we would never speak to each other face to face.
And then, of course, we know it’s addictive. We’ve all had that compulsive feeling to pick up our phone + check for a notification - for no real reason.
These are just some of the downsides of social media.
THE LESS OBVIOUS
Something I had never thought about until this week, though, is how our scrolling habits are impacting our brains + behavior in ways we might NOT be aware of.
Think about it.
When you spend THAT much time doing something, it rewires your brain.
That’s how our brains are designed. To notice patterns. To conserve energy by automating through repetition.
If I spent 2 hours + 27 minutes every day learning a new language or practicing a musical instrument or building a business, I can assure you, I would get good at those things. So would you.
The question is:
What are we getting really ‘good’ at by spending all that precious time scrolling?
Good question!
JUDGMENT
As we scroll, our brains are busy at work - judging (aka ‘engagement”). The brain is sifting + sorting. Deciding what to look at, what to click on + what to give attention to.
Keep scrolling? Stop? Click? Dig further?
Now, think about your brain practicing this behavior for more than two hours every day! Eek!
This activity goes beyond our conscious behavior, too.
We’ve all had those times when we got sucked into something while scrolling + next thing you know, we’ve lost a big block of time.
Think about what your brain was doing during that time. Sifting. Sorting. Judging. Deciding. Even while you were not paying attention.
You can see how this repetitive behavior + exercise would completely rewire our brains. How we judge. The way we sift + sort. The speed at which we decide. The values we utilize.
Obviously, judgment is an important human behavior. We need judgment. It’s what leads to discernment.
The problem?
When our judgment skills become too quick, too siloed, too removed from consequence - that’s when we get ourselves into trouble.
We need to be able to judge in a less black/white, yes/no, swipe left/right sort of way.
There is SO much more complexity + dimension needed to deal with our current issues + challenges.
We can’t have our brains operating in such a linear, either/or sort of way. If we want to be wiser, better decision-makers, I think we’d agree that there might be better ways to practice training our brains than ‘scrolling’.
COMPARISON
The other thing that happens naturally while scrolling is comparison.
We can’t avoid it. We tell ourselves not to compare. Not to believe every image that we see. Not to assume that every happy picture means a picture-perfect life.
But, we are human + we can’t help, but compare.
Every image, idea or thought we encounter makes us question how we fit in.
Where do we belong? Are we on track? How do we compare?
You’d think comparison would be good. It should bring us together, right?
We should be able to connect with each other. Compare notes. Share stories of success + failure. Save each other time. Encourage + inspire each other.
But instead, comparison leaves us feeling inadequate, less than, behind + alone.
What’s worse is we let comparison separate us. If we are not like that other person, we must be unique. We convince ourselves we are the ONLY one with our set of circumstances. No one has ever faced the challenges we face. We are the ONLY ones.
This kind of thinking keeps us from reaching out or asking for help because we have convinced ourselves that we are so unique, no one CAN help us.
We do the opposite of connecting. We isolate.
As humans, we can’t survive by ourselves. We need to belong. Isolation is death.
JUDGING + COMPARING TOGETHER = RELATING
It gets really interesting when we put the two of these together!
Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to connect with someone over something negative? Even with a total stranger, it’s much easier to bond over gossip or complaining than it is to stand out in all our joy + enthusiasm.
We try to match our energy to the person we are with.
Think of all the times you’ve brought your own energy down in order to connect with someone else. We want to relate, so we quickly find something we can all agree on - which is usually something bad.
We think we are being empathetic, but a lot of times it’s just the safest way to connect quickly. We want to be relatable. We want to find common connections. We don’t want to stand out as better than or having more than someone else.
We’re funny, right? Half the time we are trying to ‘keep up’. The rest of the time we are trying to look like we aren’t ahead because we don’t want to make someone feel bad as we go blazing by.
RINSE + REPEAT
If you really think about the repetitive nature of a game + how with lots of practice, you can wire your brain to play it well - it makes sense.
If we spend a couple of hours a day on social media judging, comparing + relating in these ways, you can bet it carries over into the rest of our lives. It affects how we feel. How we operate. How we connect.
It’s something to think about, right?
YOUR MISSION:
I encourage you to pay attention to your own habits around scrolling. Pay attention to the time spent. Think about what your brain is doing. What are you practicing + reinforcing? How does judgment + comparison play into your scrolling? How does it creep into other areas of your life? Do you see ways you can flip this?
RESOURCES:
LISTEN: Max Fisher | The Rich Roll Podcast
READ: The Chaos Machine | Max Fisher
WATCH: Brendon Burchard | YouTube Channel
READ: Books by Brendon Burchard | Take your pick! All good!
IN SUMMARY:
At my age, I am really paying attention to my brain health. Maybe you are, too. With Alzheimer’s on the rise + so many other mental health concerns, we can really give ourselves a LIFT by paying attention to what we expose our brains to on a regular basis.
I’m always trying to find time to do brain exercises + puzzles. While I’m not discounting those ‘games’, I think maybe if we placed a little more attention + intention on putting our brains to work on more complex + meaningful challenges + pursuits, we would find ourselves with much healthier brains. (Dare I say, hearts, too!)
I hope that gives you a little something to chew on this week.
See you next week?
Meanwhile - you can read thru the archives here. And, please reach out to me anytime!
Email: karen@becounter.com
Instagram: @redefiningkaren
You’ve really opened my eyes about rewiring our brains with scrolling! I’ve been actively trying to reduce TV and social media time but completely failed to acknowledge how it’s changing my thinking patterns. Looking forward to catching up on our coffee date!!!
I so hope a ton of parents will read this and encourage their offspring to scroll a whole bunch less!!
Thankfully, I don't scroll near as much as the average person!! Thanks again for the truly important information you share.