Wow! This one really hit home!! As an older woman, I can say the longer a person’s avoids the crooked path, the harder it is to break a pattern. AND yet it is still possible to change how I ‘prefer your coffee’. Thanks for another inspiring message that I’ll be chewing on all day.
This article hit the nail on the head! The fear of getting something wrong stops me in my tracks- especially since my husband died and I'm on my own. Part of the fear is that I won't be able to fix it when I'm wrong. One trick that helps is thinking of what I am doing as an experiment - the pressure seems to lessen.
Apparently since getting older I'm (almost) paralyzed trying to bring in a second income, one that I'm passionate about. First it was trying virtual assisting, then it was a dog treat business, Etsy and Gum Road stores (one item in each, never got further), working in retail (couldn't stand and do nothing for hours on end), a deli (couldn't stand the smell of meat)—the latter two were a weak attempt at going back into the work force, which I quickly figured out wasn't my desire—and the list goes on.
I started Substack on a whim. I wanted to market my latest products (creating printables) but that fizzled out because of my paralysis for graphic design, so no sellable printables. It's something I want to do so badly but talent isn't there. So I start and stop creating, resorting to coloring books to build up confidence for completing art. (Lately it's gotten so bad I buy coloring books, with color by numbers.)
Fortunately my Substack is holding up, even though each new article (in my mind) is horrible, but I push publish anyway. I promised myself 52 weeks of publishing, no matter how horrible, though I do my best.
I think the perfect end result would be my creating art and selling it. Of course this is as far from what I've done my entire life (casino gambling) at it can get. But. I'm still holding out hope I'll break through this paralysis - it's been about six years in the making. Great article, it gives me food for thought.
I hear you Patti! And I love that you are experimenting, pushing yourself and also not forcing things when you know it is not working for you. I have had SO many stops and starts in recent years that it feels exhausting at times. I envy those who find their thing and just lean in. (Of course, there is effort in everything that appears effortless.) One observation I will share with you...you used the word ‘paralyzed’ and then listed all of the things you’ve tried. That sounds the opposite of paralyzed. No? You may just be tired of trying. Tired of the Yearning. I would just keep leaning into those things you enjoy and want to try. Trusting it will take you exactly where you need/want to be next. (And yes, I’m talking to myself here lol). Keep going!
I don't know if paralyzed is the right word, but it comes to mind when opportunities come up to learn something new. Now I feel like I need to get something out of everything I've tried other than "you completed the class."
Yes, I can say I'm tired of trying, but it's difficult to sit and do nothing. It's why I'm pushing to do even the simplest of activities to 'do something, lest I do nothing.'
It's weird aging. It feels like everything is a battle... but I know what it feels like to do nothing... or 'give up' entirely...
Haha, if I do (only) things I truly enjoy at this point, I'd probably bed rot as they say on TikTok. Luckily I drive on in small ways and I'll keep hoping for the best.
Cheering you on and just know you're not alone! Speaking of alone - I just listened to this podcast yesterday. It was such a great conversation and made me feel so 'at home' in this crazy stage of life. You might really enjoy it. This is the YouTube version, but you can find it on your favorite podcast app, too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ygLdQRUXKQ
Great video!! I love Rich Roll, so this was an all around great suggestion! Showing up was the first take-away I took, so running with it... and another was lowering expectations down to a dull roar. It helped a lot, so a big thank you!! It gives me things to think about.
Oh I look forward to reading it... showing up is really a thing. Part of it has to do with how we do things here in the US. It's hard to commit to a plan 3 weeks away... committing to tomorrow is much easier and I'm more inclined to show up. It's a European thing I'm finding out... they don't make plans far in advance. They're rather impromptu. One of the reasons I'm really pushing to move out of the US.
Wow! This one really hit home!! As an older woman, I can say the longer a person’s avoids the crooked path, the harder it is to break a pattern. AND yet it is still possible to change how I ‘prefer your coffee’. Thanks for another inspiring message that I’ll be chewing on all day.
This article hit the nail on the head! The fear of getting something wrong stops me in my tracks- especially since my husband died and I'm on my own. Part of the fear is that I won't be able to fix it when I'm wrong. One trick that helps is thinking of what I am doing as an experiment - the pressure seems to lessen.
Thanks for sharing Janice. Such a great tip. And we are always more capable than we realize or believe.
I am finding that to be true.
Apparently since getting older I'm (almost) paralyzed trying to bring in a second income, one that I'm passionate about. First it was trying virtual assisting, then it was a dog treat business, Etsy and Gum Road stores (one item in each, never got further), working in retail (couldn't stand and do nothing for hours on end), a deli (couldn't stand the smell of meat)—the latter two were a weak attempt at going back into the work force, which I quickly figured out wasn't my desire—and the list goes on.
I started Substack on a whim. I wanted to market my latest products (creating printables) but that fizzled out because of my paralysis for graphic design, so no sellable printables. It's something I want to do so badly but talent isn't there. So I start and stop creating, resorting to coloring books to build up confidence for completing art. (Lately it's gotten so bad I buy coloring books, with color by numbers.)
Fortunately my Substack is holding up, even though each new article (in my mind) is horrible, but I push publish anyway. I promised myself 52 weeks of publishing, no matter how horrible, though I do my best.
I think the perfect end result would be my creating art and selling it. Of course this is as far from what I've done my entire life (casino gambling) at it can get. But. I'm still holding out hope I'll break through this paralysis - it's been about six years in the making. Great article, it gives me food for thought.
I hear you Patti! And I love that you are experimenting, pushing yourself and also not forcing things when you know it is not working for you. I have had SO many stops and starts in recent years that it feels exhausting at times. I envy those who find their thing and just lean in. (Of course, there is effort in everything that appears effortless.) One observation I will share with you...you used the word ‘paralyzed’ and then listed all of the things you’ve tried. That sounds the opposite of paralyzed. No? You may just be tired of trying. Tired of the Yearning. I would just keep leaning into those things you enjoy and want to try. Trusting it will take you exactly where you need/want to be next. (And yes, I’m talking to myself here lol). Keep going!
I don't know if paralyzed is the right word, but it comes to mind when opportunities come up to learn something new. Now I feel like I need to get something out of everything I've tried other than "you completed the class."
Yes, I can say I'm tired of trying, but it's difficult to sit and do nothing. It's why I'm pushing to do even the simplest of activities to 'do something, lest I do nothing.'
It's weird aging. It feels like everything is a battle... but I know what it feels like to do nothing... or 'give up' entirely...
Haha, if I do (only) things I truly enjoy at this point, I'd probably bed rot as they say on TikTok. Luckily I drive on in small ways and I'll keep hoping for the best.
Cheering you on and just know you're not alone! Speaking of alone - I just listened to this podcast yesterday. It was such a great conversation and made me feel so 'at home' in this crazy stage of life. You might really enjoy it. This is the YouTube version, but you can find it on your favorite podcast app, too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ygLdQRUXKQ
Great video!! I love Rich Roll, so this was an all around great suggestion! Showing up was the first take-away I took, so running with it... and another was lowering expectations down to a dull roar. It helped a lot, so a big thank you!! It gives me things to think about.
Yes me too! My next post is about showing up. That really stuck out for me. Loved the whole conversation - so much to chew on. Glad it was helpful.
Oh I look forward to reading it... showing up is really a thing. Part of it has to do with how we do things here in the US. It's hard to commit to a plan 3 weeks away... committing to tomorrow is much easier and I'm more inclined to show up. It's a European thing I'm finding out... they don't make plans far in advance. They're rather impromptu. One of the reasons I'm really pushing to move out of the US.
Made me wonder what my next imperfect steps will be! Thought-provoking article! Dee❤️